Am I Trying Too Hard To Keep A Man?


Am I Trying Too Hard To Keep A Man?

Dear Bunmi,

FOR nine months now, I’ve had a relationship with a girl but I still haven’t introduced her to my friends or family. The reason is that I know they won’t consider her good enough for me.

They’re used to seeing me with stunning women and this girl’s a bit fat and unsophisticated. She’s also a bit short and I’m sure they’ll all laugh at my choice.

My parents won’t like her because she’s like a village girl. I’m worried that when i See her with everyone else, i won’t like her as much either.

Jimi,   by e-mail.

Dear Jimi,

While it shouldn’t matter what our friends and family think of our partners, it only does it make it a whole lot easier if everyone gets on, it makes us doubt our judgment if others give the thumbs down.

You, however, are in a good position here. You know your friends are likely to judge her for being ‘a bit fat’. It clearly doesn’t worry you. So friends pointing this out is unlikely to change your feelings for her. You know your parents will turn up their nose at her being not as sophisticated as them, so that won’t come as a surprise either.

I’m sure your friend and family want to see you happy. What if you told them you’ve been seeing someone you want to have a future with and really want her to meet the other people in your life? If you put it like that, they’ll realize you’re serious and hopefully be less inclined to make tactless comments.



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